Your son and his girlfriend finally got engaged after three years of dating and have fixed their wedding date. Though nowadays, the bride and the groom take the whole responsibility of arranging the wedding, the groom’s mother also has some important duties. Following these mother-of-the-groom responsibilities is a good way of showing your happiness. Moreover, by involving yourself in the preparations for the wedding, you can try to develop a bond with your son and daughter-in-law. Before you plan anything for the wedding, it is always better to inform them that you would be happy to help them. Tell them about the responsibilities that you will like to take and also that you will also be ready to take on additional responsibilities if they want you to.
Responsibilities of Mother of the Groom
It is the responsibility of the groom’s family to pay for the expenses of the engagement and wedding rings. Besides this, the groom’s parents also have to pay for his wedding suit, boutonnieres for the groomsmen, bouquet for the bride, transportation expenses, etc. The groom’s mother must look after all these arrangements. As, in today’s world, most of the wedding expenses are handled by the couple themselves, these traditional customs may not be followed. However, you may inform that you are ready to help them financially if the need arises.
If you have any wedding traditions that are followed in your family, inform to the bride and the groom before they make all the arrangements for the wedding ceremony. However, one must remember that as many couples opt for informal wedding ceremonies, they don’t need to incorporate them into the wedding. Hence, you must keep an open mind and accept their decision positively.
Party for the Bride
Though this is unnecessary, organizing a party involving extended family members will be a great way of introducing them to the bride. This need not be a lavish party; rather, just a sit-down dinner or maybe a barbecue at your backyard will be fine. You can also arrange this party at a resort on a weekend where all your family members can relax and get to know the new family member.
Selecting your Dress for the Wedding
Though you must be excited to start shopping for your wedding dress, you must wait until the bride’s party has done theirs. Your dress should coordinate with what the bride’s mother is wearing. If she has opted for a ballroom dress, you will have to buy the same thing. On the other hand, if she has bought a cocktail dress, make it a point that you select a cocktail dress too. However, the color of the dresses should not match; rather, the color of your dress should complement the other. Also, ensure that your dress’s color is not similar to that of the bridesmaids.
Making the Guest List
One of the responsibilities of the mother of the groom is to create a guest list of the groom side and give it to the bride. However, before making a list, do not forget to ask the bride and the groom on whether they have decided on the number of guests for sending wedding invitations. This will depend on the type of wedding they have decided on i.e. whether they want a grand affair or a low-key one. If they are opting for the later and you think that you have considerably cut down on your guest list, you can arrange for a party a few days or weeks after the wedding for uninvited friends.
Another important responsibility that comes upon the mother of the groom is arranging the rehearsal dinner for the wedding. The rehearsal dinner need not be as elaborate as the actual wedding one, and it can be a simple affair with finger foods and salads served in paper plates. However, if you want to make the rehearsal dinner a grand affair, no one will surely stop you from doing this. Though you can cut down on the food and decorations, remember to include all the guests you are planning to call to the wedding.
Duties before the Wedding Day
The groom’s mother must attend the bridal shower and give her soon-to-be daughter-in-law a gift. It will also be great if she arrives before the shower and helps make the necessary arrangements like decorating, cooking, etc. Another way she can help is by personally calling up the guests who have not replied to the RSVP before the time they were expected to.
Wedding Day Duties
The wedding day duties of the mother of the groom is not very elaborate like the rest of the members of the wedding party. The groom’s mother will be led through the aisle by one of the groomsmen or the groom himself, followed by her husband, and will be seated on the first row of the right-hand side. After the wedding ceremony, the mother of the groom is responsible for standing at the entrance between her daughter-in-law and her mother to welcome the guests and introduce them to the guests from the groom’s side.
These are some of the mother of the groom responsibilities you must follow. One important thing you must remember is that though you can give your opinions and advice to the couple for planning the wedding, do not force your suggestions on them. Remember that, after all it is their wedding and they have all the right to make it as they want it to be. By being too authoritative, you may actually spoil the relationship between your son and his wife. Hence, ask them what help they expect from you and enjoy your child’s special day.