The dictionary defines a best man as ‘the bridegroom’s chief attendant at a wedding’. So, for all the to-be-best men out there, who thought that all they had to do was dance with the bridesmaid and have a blast, it’s time for a wake-up call. However, presuming you are the groom’s brother or best friend, the news is not all bad. If you’ve stood by each other through all of life’s significant happenings so far, you’ll be pretty happy to be by his side as he takes this life-altering step. Apart from providing moral support and encouragement, you will also have to do some heavy lifting.
Part of the best man’s duties and responsibilities is to ensure that the groom looks his best on his big day. Thus, you will have to be the stylist cum personal shopper in the days preceding the wedding. You will have to help the groom pick out a tux (or whatever he plans to wear) and shoes. Additionally, you will also have to pick out your own suit, and arrange the same for the other groomsmen. If the groom is wearing a rental suit, the responsibility of picking up and returning the suit lies with you.
Another of the best man’s responsibilities is organizing the bachelor party. Assuming you know the groom very well, you will be in the best position to organize this party. Instead of planning a run-of-the-mill bacchanal, consider what the groom will enjoy the most. It may be a weekend out, fishing or camping with the guys. When it comes to planning, ensure to enlist the help of other close friends and relatives so that the task does not get overwhelming. And lastly, don’t forget to split the cost with all those who attend the get-together.
Usually, the most dreaded of the best man’s duties at a wedding, is the toast/best man’s wedding speech. A good rule is to have it ready at least two weeks in advance, so you will have ample time to practice it. Another suggestion is to prepare the wedding speech when you are aware of the impending nuptials. This way it may change its form several times, but the final result will include everything you want to say. However, if expressing yourself is not your strong point, you can always pick up ready toasts and modify them to suit your situation. Ensure you say good things about the groom and make it humorous.
With these, we’ve covered some of the larger tasks to be carried out. However, some equally important duties of a best man at a wedding remain.
- A vital responsibility of the best man is bringing the bride’s wedding ring to the ceremony. The flurry of activity preceding the wedding can often mean that this important task is forgotten. So, ensure you bring the ring, and hold onto it till the time the groom asks for it during the ceremony.
- Ensure you are present for the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner, where you will get a chance to familiarize yourself with everyone and the maid of honor, whom you are to accompany down the aisle.
- Walk the maid of honor down the aisle, and later dance with her and the bride during the wedding reception dances.
- You must sign the marriage license as a witness at the end of the ceremony. You may also be asked to give the officiant a sealed envelope with his or her fee upon the ceremony’s completion.
These are the basic responsibilities of the best man, in addition to which he may be requested to carry out many other tasks. They may include tasks such as decorating the getaway and collecting gift envelopes. To be a good best man, reach the scheduled place of the wedding a few days before and stay there for a few days after the wedding so that you are there for the groom and can lend a helping hand whenever needed.