Looking for ways to personalize your wedding ceremony? Consider incorporating your own carefully chosen words into this momentous occasion and build the foundation for a life-long relationship. Writing your own vows is an ambitious undertaking. Not only must you determine the perfect words to say, but those words must be rehearsed and recited in front of your closest family and friends on a day that will be one of the most important of your life. Follow these easy steps to pen and recite beautiful vows from the heart.

Step One: Before you put pen to paper, consider these factors:

Get Approval

Talk to your officiant to make sure personal vows are even allowed. Some religions object to non-secular expressions during the wedding ceremony. Even with the go-ahead, submit your personalized vows to your officiant for review before the big day; he or she may have specific objections or helpful ideas.

Establish An Estimated Length –

Your audience will find it odd and even comical if one rambles for 5 minutes while the other says ten words.

Be Succinct

Overly lengthy wedding vows may lose your audience and will only increase the potential for error. Review them in front of someone else. You can rehearse with each other, or if you’d rather keep them a surprise, read your vows to a trusted loved one.

Step Two: Decide What to Say:

Consult Your Past

Time for a trip down memory lane. Start jotting down the details of special firsts in your relationship-first meeting, first date, first kiss, first “I love you,” etc. What qualities made you fall in love in the first place? Have special milestones in your relationship helped bring you here today?

Envision The Future

What challenges and achievements do you foresee in the future, and how do you expect to meet those things together?

Complete Me

Sure, it’s a line from a movie-but there’s a reason for its now cliché status. What characteristics does he/she bring out in you? How does he/she make you a better person?

Use The Right Words

Compile your notes, memories, and reflections, and begin turning words into sentences. Consult your thesaurus for the perfect expressions to reflect your thoughts. Some words to get you started: love, trust, support, strength, encourage, respect, cherish, admire, value, commit, pledge and promise.

Step 3: Say it With Heart:

Have A Cheat Sheet

Even if you plan to memorize them, the nerves may kick in when the big moment arrives. Bring a cheat sheet just in case to avoid a potentially awkward scene at the wedding ceremony.